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Why People Torture and Abuse

Uploaded 1/25/2012, approx. 3 minute read

My name is Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Malignant Self-Love, Narcissism Revisited.


Why do people torture? Why do people abuse others?

We should distinguish functional torture from sadistic abuse.

Functional torture is calculated to extract information from the torture victim or to punish her. It is measured, impersonal, efficient and disinterested. It's professional.

Sadistic abuse fulfills the emotional needs of a perpetrator.

Most perpetrators feel that they have lost control over their lives. Offenders, torturers, abusers feel out of control.

People who find themselves in anomic states, for instance, soldiers in war or incarcerated inmates in prison, this kind of people tend to feel helpless and alienated. They experience a partial or total loss of control over their lives. They have been rendered vulnerable, powerless and defenseless by events and circumstances beyond their influence.

So, they resort to torture.

Torture amounts to an absolute and all pervasive domination of the victim's body and existence.

So, when the abuser abuses, when the tormentor tortures, it's a coping strategy.

They wish to reassert control over their lives by asserting control over the victim.

But totally controlling the victim, they re-establish their mastery and prove their superiority.

By subjugating the tortured, they regain their self-confidence and they regulate the sense of self-worth.

Other types of tormentors channel their negative emotions, pent-up aggression, humiliation, rage, envy, diffuse hatred. They displace these emotions.

The victim becomes a symbol of everything that's wrong in the torturer's life and everything that's reprehensible in the situation in which the abuser finds himself, in which he is caught.

The act of torture amounts to misplaced and violent venting.

Many perpetrate heinous acts out of a wish to conform. Torturing others is their way of demonstrating of secret obeisances to authority, their way of cementing group affiliation, connection and adherence to the same ethical code of conduct and common values.

Such abusers, torturers and tormentors, bask in the phrase that is heaped upon them by their superiors, fellow workers, associates, teammates or collaborators.

Their need to belong is so strong that it overpowers ethical, moral or legal considerations.

Many offenders derive pleasure and satisfaction from sadistic acts of humiliation. To these people, inflicting pain is fun.

They lack empathy and so the victim's agonized reactions are merely cause for much hilarity.

Sadism is rooted in deviant sexuality. The torture inflicted by status is bound to involve perverted sex, rape, homosexual rape, voyeurism, exhibitionism, pedophilia, fetishism and other paraphilias, aberrant sex, unlimited power, excruciating pain. These are the intoxicating ingredients of the sadistic variant cocktail of torture.

Still, torture rarely occurs where it does not have the sanction and blessing of the authorities, whether local or national.

A permissive environment is sine qua non.

The more abnormal the circumstances, the less normative the milieu, the further the scene of the crime is from public scrutiny, the more is egregious torture likely to occur.

This is especially true in totalitarian societies where the use of physical force to discipline or eliminate dissent is an acceptable practice and part of the regime.

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Sadist: The Pleasure of Your Pain, the Anguish of Your Pleasure (and Narcissist)

Sadism is characterized by a pattern of cruelty and a lack of empathy, often manifesting in interpersonal contexts rather than physical violence. The sadist derives pleasure from humiliating and controlling others, often using their vulnerabilities to inflict emotional pain. While narcissists can exhibit sadistic behaviors, their motivations differ; they typically inflict pain as a means to achieve narcissistic supply rather than for the sheer enjoyment of causing suffering. The distinction lies in that true sadists find gratification in the act of inflicting pain itself, while narcissists may do so incidentally or instrumentally to maintain their sense of superiority.


Are All Narcissists Also Sadists? (Compilation)

Sadism is characterized by the pleasure derived from inflicting pain and humiliation on others, often involving premeditated actions aimed at achieving a sense of power and control. In contrast, cruelty is typically a reaction to personal humiliation or mortification, serving as a means to restore one's grandiose self-image rather than a pursuit of pleasure. While sadists find gratification in the suffering of others, cruel individuals may experience guilt and view their actions as necessary for a greater moral purpose. The distinction lies in the motivations behind the behavior: sadism is hedonistic and self-serving, while cruelty is often rooted in a desire for retribution or justice. Ultimately, sadism is a stable personality trait, whereas cruelty is situational and can cease once the perceived threat or grievance is resolved.


Cruelty Is Not Sadism Narcissism, Not Pleasure

Cruelty and sadism are distinct concepts, with cruelty being a reactive response often stemming from feelings of mortification and a desire to restore a grandiose self-image, while sadism is characterized by a premeditated pleasure derived from inflicting pain on others. Cruelty is self-regulatory and can be seen as a narcissistic defense mechanism, whereas sadism is performative and focused on external gratification. The cruel individual often justifies their actions as necessary for retributive justice or moral superiority, believing they are restoring order or cleansing the world. In contrast, sadism does not rely on the victim's acknowledgment of suffering and is a consistent character trait, making it fundamentally different from the situational nature of cruelty.


Abuser, Sadist – or Both?

The scene in the hotel bar illustrates the dynamics of sadism, where the sadist derives pleasure from inflicting pain and humiliation on others, prioritizing this gratification over typical sexual or social rewards. Sadists often engage in behaviors that are self-destructive and counterproductive, yet they persist because the power they feel from causing distress is intoxicating and reinforces their sense of superiority. This pleasure principle, rooted in a deep-seated need for control and validation, distinguishes sadists from typical abusers, who may cause pain incidentally while pursuing other goals. Ultimately, sadism is characterized by an addiction to the emotional and psychological power gained through the suffering of others, making it a complex and often incomprehensible phenomenon.


Masochistic Personality Disorder (Masochism)

Masochists often internalize feelings of worthlessness and unworthiness, leading them to engage in self-destructive behaviors that undermine their own happiness and success. They tend to seek out painful experiences and relationships, rejecting help and support while gravitating towards situations that result in failure and disappointment. Their actions serve as a means of catharsis, relieving pent-up anxiety but simultaneously avoiding intimacy and its benefits. Additionally, masochists may provoke negative responses from others to reinforce their self-perception, finding comfort in humiliation and defeat.


So, Is My Narcissist a Covert Narcissist? Nonsense vs. Scholarship

Covert narcissists are individuals who suffer from an in-depth sense of inferiority, have a marked propensity towards feeling ashamed, and are shy and fragile. They are unable to genuinely depend on others or trust them, suffer from chronic envy of others, and have a lack of regard for generational boundaries. Covert narcissists are not goal-orientated, have shallow vocational commitment, and are forgetful of details, especially names. Inverted narcissists are a subspecies of covert narcissism and are self-centered, sensitive, vulnerable, and defensive, sometimes hostile and paranoid.


Narcissist's Pathological Space: His Kingdom

The pathological narcissistic space is a geographical area, group of people, or an abstract field of knowledge in which the narcissistic pathology reaches its full expression and effectiveness. It is a territorially expanded false self that is achieved via sources of narcissistic supply. The existence of the pathological narcissistic space is independent of the existence of sources of narcissistic supply. The pathological narcissistic space constantly consumes and drains narcissistic supply, and it generates negative narcissistic accumulation.


Inverted Narcissist (Narcissist Codependent)

Inverted narcissists are a type of codependent who exclusively depend on a narcissist. They are self-effacing, sensitive, emotionally fragile, and sometimes socially phobic. They derive all their self-esteem and sense of self-worth from the outside and are pathologically envious. Inverted narcissists are narcissists, and it is possible to compose a set of criteria for them by translating the criteria available in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for the classical narcissist.


Shameful Core of Covert Narcissist: Inferior Vulnerability Compensated

There are two primary types of narcissists: grandiose overt narcissists, who display dominant antisocial traits, and covert vulnerable narcissists, who often present as victims and are characterized by feelings of shame and inadequacy. Shame plays a crucial role in the development of these narcissistic traits, particularly in covert narcissism, where it is linked to a deep sense of inferiority and emotional dysregulation. While grandiose narcissists may suppress shame and maintain a facade of confidence, vulnerable narcissists are more likely to experience intense feelings of shame, leading to self-loathing and maladaptive behaviors. The distinction between these two types of narcissism is essential for understanding their underlying psychological mechanisms and the impact of shame on their behaviors.


Narcissist's Routines

Narcissists have a series of routines that are developed through rote learning and repetitive patterns of experience. These routines are used to reduce anxiety and transform the world into a manageable and controllable one. The narcissist is a creature of habit and finds change unsettling. The narcissist's routines are often broken down when they are breached or can no longer be defended, leading to a narcissistic injury.

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