New Year on Planet Mental Illness

Uploaded 12/31/2022, approx. 6 minute read

In New Zealand, it's already the new year, and shortly it will be the new year for all of us, perhaps with one exception, the mentally ill.

I've been working with the mentally ill for 26 years. I myself am mentally ill.

And for us, there is no new year, only a long continuum of tedious attempts to cope with who we are, with our dysfunctions, with our mishaps, with the sad turns of events in our lives.

Because you see, we, the mentally ill, are like astronauts stranded on some alien planet.

It is total disorientation. The landscape seems foreign. We don't know where to turn. We don't know what to do. We don't even know why should we do anything.

Mental illness is a state of disconnect, a state of discontinuity and disjointedness.

There's no gyroscope. There is no core identity, no guiding light, no northern star, no caressing hand, no embrace and no hugs and no warmth and no acceptance and no love.

Mental illness is a cancer of the soul. It's allconsuming. It's alldevouring. It's merciless. And its advance is unhindered by any external intervention.

What happens to us, the mentally ill, internally, is equally puzzling and bewildering.

We are at a loss as to why we feel the way we do, why the ups and downs, why the confusion, what is external and what is inside us. Who did what to whom and why always remains a whodunit never to be resolved by a miraculous Agatha Christie.

It's a perpetual mystery, first and foremost, to us, the mentally ill.

There are goodwilling people out there, therapists, social workers, life coaches and academic lecturers such as myself.

And we try to make sense of the insensible and the senseless. We try to imbue meaning into that which is random and chancy and haphazard. We try to provide structure with us only chaos.

And we try to extract and extricate people from the maelstrom of their own agony and the vortex of their own decomposition and disintegration because mental illness is inexorable in many cases.

And the mentally ill are heartbreaking. There's such a sad sight.

Some of them are beautiful, goodlooking, super intelligent, amazingly insightful when it comes to others. Some of them are goodhearted. Some of them just want to survive like all of us.

And yet they can't. There's an enemy from within, a Trojan horse, a fifth column, a gurnika of the mind, a constant bombardment of introjects and voices and delinquent constructs, all conspiring to unsettle, unravel and devastate the inner landscape of the mentally ill.

There's no reality. There are only cognitive distortions. Everyone around the mentally ill is but a shadow, a penumbral apparition.

Mental ill cannot grasp objects of any kind, human and non-human. They cannot really tackle the flow and ebb of cause and effect to them, to the mentally ill.

Identity is a kind of theater of the absurd, a stream of consciousness uninterrupted by any Marcel Proust, a remembrance of things past that had never existed and a dissociation of memories that should have been there and should have provided the foundation for an identity because forgetting is the core strategy of the mentally ill.

Depersonalization, autopilot, derealization, the feeling that you're in a movie, a mere spectator or observer obeying some script written not by you, colluding and collaborating with actors, not of your own making and unknown to you.

It is a disheartening nightmarish prospects. It's surrealistic and it is buffeted by emotional tsunamis, dysregulated forces that, like tectonic shifts, unravel and destroy whatever structure you manage to put over decades of desperate attempts to reconstruct and reinvent yourself.

There's an all-consuming anxiety catastrophizing in a hostile world, hopelessness as to the outcomes of your own existence and the helplessness to change them.

It's like a permanent infantile state being dependent upon forces which have no name and no description and no vector and no momentum and no direction, forces which are impersonal, forces which are pitiless, forces which are there ultimately to decimate you, the mentally ill.

It means all-consuming.

Morality play.

You try to make sense of the world by splitting it into good and bad, right and wrong, victim and perpetrator.

But the world is made of gray shades.

It's never black and white.

And so you miss out on social cues and sexual cues.

You fail to understand body language and the messaging and signaling of other people.

You wander utterly, utterly befuddled, dazzled, bedazzled by the blows of a harsh life.

And finally, you fade into the long night of your own demise.

This is what it means to be mentally ill.

This new year, let your thoughts and hopes, for those of you who are delusionally religious, your great prayers be with these people, some of whom are homeless, some of whom are poor, and all of them unhappy, wallowing in their misery, looking forward to nothing, realizing that their entire lives are already behind them.

The children of the fog, the children of the mist, those who have emerged scathed and wounded and scarred from the vagaries of childhood abuse, the wrong genetics, some brain abnormality, the mentally ill amongst you.

Do not cast them out or away.

Help them as far as you can.

Do not sacrifice yourself for them.

But do not be heartless and harsh and merciless when you countenance them and encounter them, because they know not what they are doing and they can do no better.

It is never your job to save anyone, to rescue anyone. It is never your task to make someone happy.

You are not responsible for anyone's emotions and states of mind.

Do not let the mentally ill drag you down into their abyss.

But do not be callous.

Do not stand aside if there is anything you can do with minimal sacrifice to help, because the mentally ill are you.

You can become mentally ill in due time.

It is an affliction.

Some of it is contagious.

Be careful lest you find yourself among those you have castigated and chastised in better times.

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Message to Mentally Ill: You are Doing the Best You Can!

Mental illness is a pervasive, consuming, and defining force that affects individuals and their relationships. It is a constant companion, overwhelming and debilitating, leading to self-loathing and self-defeat. The mentally ill face stigma, ostracization, and ridicule, as they struggle to fit in and make others happy. Despite the challenges, they continue to strive for success and self-acceptance, embracing defeat and failure as part of their journey.

Avoid Mentally Ill: No Families, Relationships

Mentally ill people want to be normal, but it is a lie that therapists and psychologists tell them that they can be cured and lead a normal life. Mental illness is a lifelong condition that is part of a person's identity and cannot be cured or healed. Mentally ill people should be managed, regulated, and isolated to prevent them from causing harm to themselves and others. Instead of seeking normalcy and intimacy, mentally ill people should focus on their areas of high functioning and accept their limitations.

Body Language of the Personality Disordered

Patients with personality disorders have a body language specific to their personality disorder. The body language comprises an unequivocal series of subtle and not-so-subtle presenting signs. A patient's body language usually reflects the underlying mental health problem or pathology. In itself, body language cannot and should not be used as a diagnostic tool.

Pedophile Narcissist: Narcissism, Pedophilia, and Hebephilia

Pedophiles are attracted to pre-pubescent children and come from all walks of life. They have no common socioeconomic background, and most have not been sexually abused in childhood. Pedophiles are drawn to what children symbolize, such as innocence and trust, and they view their relationships with children in a peculiar light. Pedophilia is a culture-bound syndrome, and the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual is considering rendering hebephilia as a subtype of pedophilia.

Psychosexuality of the Personality Disordered

Sexual behavior can reveal a lot about a person's personality, including their psychosexual makeup, emotions, cognitions, socialization, traits, heredity, and learned and acquired behaviors. Patients with personality disorders often have thwarted and stunted sexuality. For example, paranoid personality disorder patients depersonalize their sexual partners, while schizoid personality disorder patients are asexual. Histrionic personality disorder patients use their sexuality to gain attention and narcissistic supply, while somatic narcissists and psychopaths use their partners' bodies to masturbate with. Borderline personality disorder patients use their sexuality to reward or punish their partners, while dependent personality disorder patients use it to enslave and condition their partners.

Mentally Ill: Bail Out, Save Yourself - Not THEM!

Mentally ill people often emotionally blackmail others into becoming their rescuers, and once they have, they want to infect them with their illness. This is because they want to share their pain and feel accepted. However, mentally ill people do not want to be helped, and they have strong resistances and defenses against healing. Therefore, it is important to harden your heart and walk away from mentally ill people to save yourself.

What Is Acting Out? (and Covert Narcissist)

Acting out is a way for individuals to discharge conflicted mental content through action, often as a result of being unable to verbalize or communicate their internal struggles. It is commonly associated with personality disorders and can lead to self-destructive behaviors. Acting out can be seen as a form of somatization, using the body to remember and process repressed memories and emotions. It is important to distinguish acting out from other concepts such as acting in, passage à l'acte, and bad behavior, as they have different implications and meanings.

Eating Disorders and Personality Disorders

Eating disorders are impulsive behaviors that can exist with cluster B personality disorders, particularly with borderline personality disorders. The key to improving the mental state of patients who have been diagnosed with both a personality disorder and an eating disorder lies in focusing it first upon their eating and sleeping disorders and only then on their personality disorders. The treatment of personality disorders requires enormous, persistent and continuous investment of resources of every kind by everyone involved, especially the patient. Patients with eating disorders may be in mortal danger, and the therapist's goal is to buy them time.

Borderline's Miracle Healing

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Controversial P Factor Unifying Mental Illness

The P factor is a controversial concept in psychology that suggests a common denominator to all mental disorders. It challenges the traditional approach of diagnosing people based on lists of symptoms or behaviors. The debate surrounding the P factor raises questions about the usefulness of labels and the need for customized treatments. Early intervention is key to preventing severe mental illness later in life.

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