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Narcissist's Beloved Paranoia

Uploaded 7/7/2011, approx. 3 minute read

My name is Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Malignant Self-Love, Narcissism Revisited.

I am the author of Cold Therapy.

My name is Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Cold Therapy.

My name is Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Cold Therapy.

My name is Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Cold Therapy.

My name is Sam Vaknin. I am the author of Cold Therapy.

My name is Sam Vaknin. And in cutting-edge with med I and in they are there to force him to abstain and refrain from certain actions which endanger them or their interests.

The narcissist feels that he is at the center of intrigues and conspiracies of colossal worldwide magnitudes. Alternatively, the narcissist feels victimized by mediocre bureaucrats and intellectual dwarves who consistently fail to appreciate his outstanding really unparalleled talents, skills and accomplishments.

Being haunted by his challenged inferiors substantiates the narcissist's comparative superiority. Driven by a pathological envy, these pygmies collude to defraud the narcissist, badger him, deny him his due, denigrate, isolate and ignore him.

The narcissist projects onto this second class of lesser persecutors his own deleterious emotions and transforms aggression. He attributes to them the very negative emotions that see the inside himself. He says that they are hateful, they are rageful, they are teeming and seething with jealousy, but actually this is exactly what is happening inside him.

The narcissist's paranoid streak is likeliest to erupt when he lacks narcissistic supply.

The regulation of his lab, in sense of self-worth is dependent upon external stimuli, adoration, adulation, affirmation, applause, notoriety, fame, infamy and in general attention of any kind. When such attention is missing, lacking, deficient, the narcissist compensates by confabulating. He constructs ungrounded narratives in which he is a protagonist and he uses these stories, these narratives, these fictions to force his human environment into complicity.

Put simply, the narcissist provokes people to pay attention to him by misbehaving or by behaving oddly or eccentrically or by claiming that he is the victim of conspiracies.

And then there's the intimacy retarding paranoia. Paranoia is used by the narcissist to ward off something he dreads, which is intimacy.

The narcissist is threatened by intimacy because it reduces him to ordinariness by exposing his weaknesses and shortcomings and by causing him to act like everyone else, normally.

The narcissist also dreads the encounter with his deep buried emotions hurt, envy, anger, aggression likely to be foisted on him in an intimate relationship.

So he seeks to reverse intimacy once it has happened or to avoid it altogether.

The paranoid narrative legitimizes intimacy repelling behaviors such as keeping one's distance, secrecy, aloofness, reclusion, aggression, intrusion on privacy, lying, desultoriness, itineracy, unpredictability, idiosyncratic or eccentric reactions. All these are fully justified when one finds himself at the center of a conspiracy or persecution.

Gradually, the narcissist succeeds to alienate and wear down all his friends, colleagues, well-wishers and mates.

Just precisely what he wanted. The narcissist wants to be left alone. Even his closest, his nearest and dearest, his family, feel emotionally detached and burned out after a certain period of time.

The paranoid narcissist ends his life as an oddball recluse, derided, feared and loathed in equal measures.

The narcissist's paranoia, exacerbated by repeated rejections and by the process of aging, pervades his entire life and diminishes his creativity, adaptability and functioning.

The narcissistic personality, buffeted by paranoia, becomes ossified and brittle.

Finally, atomized, isolated and useless, this personality succumbs and gives way to a great void. The narcissist is consumed and is no more.

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Paranoia, Narcissistic Mirroring, and Narcissistic Reflection

Narcissists tend to react with paranoia when they feel threatened, but these attacks tend to fade and the narcissist frequently homes in on new agents of persecution. The narcissist's paranoia is a grandiose fantasy aimed to regulate their sense of self-worth. The narcissist's partner tends to encourage their paranoid or threatening attention, and this is a game of two. Living with a narcissist can tilt one's mind toward abnormal reactions, and even after separation, the narcissist's partners typically still care for the narcissist greatly.


When Narcissist Says "I Love You" - What Does It Mean To Him?

Narcissists and borderlines often mislabel and misidentify their internal processes as love and intimacy, despite being incapable of experiencing true love or intimacy. They confuse dependency, limerence, exhibitionism, masochism, defiance, competitiveness, possessiveness, neediness, and people-pleasing with love and intimacy. This mislabeling is an attempt at self-restoration and bridging confabulation, as they have a diminished self-insight and inability to introspect. Their constant attempt to explain or describe their internal processes is an effort to restore their being, relationship with the world, and ultimately their identity.


Narcissist's Romantic Jealousy and Possessiveness

Narcissists experience anxiety when they become aware of their possessive and jealous tendencies. Anxiety characterizes all their interactions with the opposite sex, especially in situations where there is a possibility of rejection or abandonment. The narcissist's envy of their female mate is a result of an unconscious conflict, and they exercise their imagination to justify their negative emotions. Narcissists often strike an unhealthy balance by being emotionally and physically absent, which drives their partner to find emotional and physical gratification outside the relationship.


Narcissist Reacts to Criticism, Disagreement, Disapproval

Narcissists are hypervigilant and perceive every disagreement as criticism and every critical comment as complete and humiliating rejection. They react defensively, becoming indignant, aggressive, and cold. The narcissist minimizes the impact of the disagreement and criticism on himself by holding the critic in contempt, by diminishing the stature of the discordant conversant. When the disagreement or criticism or disapproval or approbation become public, the narcissist tends to regard them as narcissistic supply.


The Signs of the Narcissist

Narcissists are difficult to spot, but there are subtle signs that can be picked up on, such as entitlement markers, idealization and devaluation, and a lack of empathy. Narcissists are often perceived as anti-social and are unable to secure the sympathy of others. They are also prone to projecting a false self and using primitive defense mechanisms such as splitting, projection, projective identification, and intellectualization.


20 Ways to Provoke the Narcissist to Meltdown, Tantrum, Apoplexy

Narcissists possess an inflated self-perception, viewing themselves as unique and superior, which makes them highly sensitive to any perceived threats to their grandiosity. Statements that imply autonomy, equality, or criticism can provoke intense rage or injury, as they challenge the narcissist's belief in their omnipotence and uniqueness. Even innocuous phrases, such as offering help or expressing agreement, can be interpreted as insults, leading to defensive or aggressive reactions. Engaging with a narcissist requires caution, as any challenge to their self-image can result in severe emotional backlash.


Narcissist: Destructive Envy and Romantic Jealousy

Envy is a compounded emotion brought on by the realization of some lack or deficiency in oneself. Narcissists cope with their pathological envy by either subsuming the object of envy via imitation or destroying it. The most dangerous species of narcissists are those who derive contentment from their own humiliation and end up driving the objects of their own devotion and accumulation to destruction and decrepititude. Romantic jealousy is a narcissistic defense that reflects the narcissistic traits and behaviors of possessiveness, objectification, and treating the spouse as an extension of oneself.


Can Narcissist Truly Love?

Narcissists are incapable of genuine love, viewing others primarily as sources of narcissistic supply, which is essentially attention. They perceive their loved ones as objects or extensions of themselves, reacting with rage to any signs of independence or autonomy. There are two types of narcissists: one seeks stability and control, while the other craves chaos and drama, but both reduce their loved ones to mere props in their lives. Ultimately, the narcissist's so-called love is rooted in fear and self-interest, leading to a cycle of idealization and devaluation of those around them.


Faces of Narcissist's Aggression

Narcissists possess a grandiose sense of self-importance and believe in their unique mission, often viewing their lives as significant narratives meant for future documentation. They expect others to recognize their entitlement and comply with their needs, leading to frustration and aggression when the world does not accommodate them. This aggression can manifest in various forms, including passive-aggressive comments disguised as helpful advice, which serve to inflict emotional harm. Ultimately, narcissists harbor deep-seated hostility and resentment, making their interactions potentially harmful to those around them.


Contemptuous Narcissist, Contemptible You, Psychopath Celebrates

Narcissists exhibit a profound sense of contempt towards others, perceiving them as weak or inferior, which reinforces their own grandiosity and sense of superiority. They are particularly triggered by any signs of vulnerability or inadequacy, interpreting these traits as threats to their self-image and using them to manipulate or exploit others. The narcissist's relationship with emotions is complex; they view emotional expression as a weakness and often react with suspicion or disdain towards those who display empathy or attachment. Ultimately, the narcissist's worldview is characterized by a zero-sum mentality, where they must constantly assert their superiority while simultaneously feeling threatened by the perceived inferiority of others.

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