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Narcissists: Homosexual and Transsexual

Uploaded 9/27/2010, approx. 5 minute read

I am Sam Vaknin, and I am the author of Malignant Self-Love, Narcissism Revisited.


Research failed to find any substantive difference between the psychological makeup of a narcissist who happens to have homosexual preferences and a heterosexual narcissist.

There is, however, one element which might be unique to homosexuals, the fact that their self-definition hinges on their sexual identity.

Heterosexuals usually would not use their sexual preferences to define themselves almost fully. Homosexuality has been inflated to the level of a subculture, separate psychology or a myth.

This is typical of persecuted minorities.

However, it does have an influence on the individual.

Reoccupation with body and sex makes most homosexual narcissists somatic narcissists.

Moreover, the homosexual makes love to a person of the same sex. In a way, he makes love to his reflection.

And in this respect, homosexual relations are highly narcissistic and autoerotic affairs.

The somatic narcissist directs his libido, his sex drive, at his own body. The cerebral narcissist concentrates on the intellect. The somatic narcissist cultivates his body, nourishes, nurtures it, often is often a hypochondriac, dedicates an inordinate amount of time to the needs of his body, both real and imaginary.

It is through his body that the somatic narcissist tracks down and captures his sources of narcissistic supply. The supply that the somatic narcissist so badly requires is derived from his shape, from his build, from his muscles, from his profile, from his beauty, from his physical attractiveness and irresistibility, from his health or from his age.

The somatic narcissist downplays narcissistic supply, directed at other traits of his, even at his intellect.

The somatic narcissist uses sex to reaffirm his prowess, his attractiveness, his resistibility, irresistibility, his youth. Love to him is synonymous with sex.

And the somatic narcissist focuses his learning skills on the sexual act, on the conquest, on the foreplay, and the quartal aftermath.

Seduction becomes addictive because it leads to a quick succession of narcissistic supply sources.

Naturally, boredom, a form of transmuted self-aggression, boredom sets in once the going gets routine. Routine is counter-narcissistic by definition because it threatens the narcissist's sense of uniqueness.

An interesting side issue relates to transsexuals.

Philosophically, there is little difference between a narcissist who seeks to avoid his true self and positively to become his false self and a transsexual who seeks to discard his true gender and positively become a member of another gender.

But this similarity, though superficially appealing, is questionable.

People sometimes seek sex reassignment because of advantages and opportunities which they believe are enjoyed by the other sex.

This rather unrealistic fantastic view of the other is faintly narcissistic. It includes elements of idealized overvaluation of self-preoccupation and of objectification of one's self. It demonstrates a deficient ability to empathize in some grandiose sense of entitlement.

Most transsexuals say, I deserve to be taken care of or of omnipotence. Some of them say I can be whatever I want to be despite nature and God, in defiance of nature and God.

This feeling of entitlement is especially manifest in some gender dysphoric individuals who aggressively pursue hormonal or surgical treatment. They feel that it is their inalienable right to receive such treatment on demand and without any strictures or restrictions.

For instance, some transsexuals refuse to undergo psychological evaluation or treatment as a condition for the hormonal or surgical treatment.

It is interesting to note that both narcissism and gender dysphoria are early childhood phenomena. This could be explained by problematic primary objects, parents, dysfunctional families, or a common genetic or biochemical problem. It is too early to say which the research is meager.

As yet, there isn't even an agreed topology of gender identity disorders, let alone an in-depth comprehension of their sources.

A radical view preferred by Ray Blanchard seems to indicate that pathological narcissism is more likely to be found among non-core, egodystonic, autogynephilic transsexuals, and among heterosexual transvestites. It is less manifest in core egosyntonic homosexual transsexuals.

Autogenophilic transsexuals are subject to an intense urge to become the opposite sex and thus to be rendered the sexual object object of their own desire. In other words, they are so sexually attracted to themselves that they wish to become both lovers in the romantic equation, the male and the female.

Becoming a male or a female is the fulfillment of the ultimate narcissistic fantasy with the false self as a fetish, a narcissistic fetish.

The transsexual, by transforming himself into the opposite sex, provides himself with a closed space, closed universe in which he, and he alone, is the lover of himself in his role as male and female.

Autogenophilic transsexuals start off as heterosexuals and end up as either bisexual or homosexual.

By shifting his or her attentions to men, the male autogenophilic transsexual proves to himself that he has finally become a true and desirable woman.

A narcissistic aspiration if we ever heard one.

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Professor Sam Vaknin discusses auto-eroticism, exhibitionism, and submissiveness in sex, particularly in relation to narcissism and psychopathy. Auto-eroticism is when someone regards themselves as their own sex object, and it is often found in narcissists and psychopaths. Exhibitionism is becoming sexually aroused by being observed, which is also a form of narcissism. Self-trashing is a behavior found in narcissists and psychopaths, where they engage in degrading sexual acts as a form of self-punishment. There is a difference between self-trashing and being submissive in BDSM, as self-trashing individuals maintain control and defiance, while submissives relinquish control to their dominant partner.


Narcissist's Psychosexuality: Deviant Pervert or Just Kinky Fun?

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Narcissist's Celibacy as a Religious Principle (ENGLISH responses)

Cerebral narcissists often redefine sexual abstinence as a form of religious ideology, viewing it as a means of self-worship and internal transformation. In contrast to Eastern traditions, where sexual energy is seen as a positive force for personal elevation, Western perspectives tend to associate sex with shame and guilt, leading to a conflicted relationship with sexuality. The modern sexual landscape, influenced by narcissism, has created a cycle of guilt and shame surrounding casual sex, which is often treated as a commodified experience devoid of emotional connection. This dissonance reflects a broader societal issue where contemporary sexual practices clash with outdated emotional frameworks, resulting in a pervasive sense of conflict and objectification in relationships.


Are You Attracted To YOURSELF? Autoerotism

Sexual attraction to oneself, known as auto-erotism, can manifest in various forms, including attraction to one's own body, imagined identities, or even past and future versions of oneself. This phenomenon is closely linked to narcissism, where individuals may engage in sexual activities that are fundamentally self-focused, often leading to an inability to form genuine connections with others. The lecture explores the intersection of auto-erotism with homosexuality, transgender identities, and gender dysphoria, suggesting that these experiences may reflect deeper narcissistic dynamics. Freud's theories on auto-erotism and narcissism provide a foundational understanding of these complex psychological phenomena, highlighting the intricate relationship between self-perception and sexual desire.


Narcissist: Pornography as Real Life (ENGLISH responses)

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Low or No Sex Drive: Disambiguation Guide

Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the typology of people with low or no sex drive, including asexuals, hyposexuals, schizoids, and cerebral narcissists. These types are autoerotic, but their other directed sexuality is impaired or non-existent. The underlying psychological issue is that these people do not need other people, and this lack of interrelatedness to other people manifests and expresses itself in their sexuality. The DSM-5 splits hyposexuality into two parts: male hypoactive sexual desire disorder and female sexual interest arousal disorder. However, the causes of hyposexuality are largely unknown, and it is essential to rule out medical, hormonal, and psychiatric issues before intervening.


Narcissist: No Sex, please, I am Cerebral!

Narcissists are autoerotic and prefer masturbation to sex. They view women with contempt and seek to torment them. The cerebral narcissist is often celibate and prefers pornography and sexual auto-stimulation to the real thing. They are afraid of encounters with the opposite sex and are even more afraid of emotional involvement or commitment that they fancy themselves prone to develop following a sexual encounter.


Narcissist's Dead Libido (ENGLISH responses)

The concept of libido, originally associated with the sexual drive, was initially viewed negatively by Freud, who saw it as a dangerous force within the primitive id that required control by the ego. Jung later reframed libido as a positive life force, encompassing creativity and vitality, a view that Freud eventually adopted in his later writings. Narcissists, however, lack a true libido, as their early trauma leads to a focus on maintenance rather than life expression, viewing relationships and even children as mere sources of supply rather than meaningful connections. Ultimately, narcissism is characterized by a profound non-existence, where the individual operates as a simulation devoid of genuine life or emotional depth.


How Narcissist LOVES YOU To ( YOUR) DEATH!

Libido, initially defined as sexual energy, has evolved to encompass all expressions of love and life instincts, playing a crucial role in psychoanalytic theory. Healthy individuals experience love through the life instinct, while narcissists misinterpret love through the death instinct, leading to a distorted perception of relationships where they seek control and emotional dominance over their partners. Narcissists lack the capacity for genuine love due to their inability to form a healthy ego and access positive emotions, resulting in a reliance on fantasy rather than reality. Ultimately, what narcissists label as love is a shared psychotic disorder, characterized by delusions and a disconnect from true emotional connection.

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